The Ugliest Man in Baseball

Julian Tavarez is not only one of the ugliest men in baseball, he is also one of the most candid.

"Why did I sign with the Nationals?" Tavarez told a group of reporters. "When you go to a club at [4 a.m.], and you're just waiting, waiting, a 600-pounder looks like J. Lo. And to me this is Jennifer Lopez right here. It's [4 a.m.]. Too much to drink. So, Nationals: Jennifer Lopez to me."

"I would like to be a starter, but it's like my father said: 'You want Jennifer Lopez, but does she want you? No.' You just take whatever she is giving to you. So I just take whatever they give to me ... They give to me as a long man, I take it as a long man. Set up man, I take it. Starter, I take it. I can do whatever."

http://network.nationalpost.com/np/blogs/postedsports/archive/2009/03/16/nationals-reliever-tavarez-may-have-been-a-bit-desperate-for-a-contract.aspx