Saturday, February 15, 2014

I Montana Montana

But first, a stop in Serbia.

Where they sell burning stoves and stuff.

And they have Albertson's (not to be confused with Soviet Safeway).

"You're going to flip over that cart."  (Inferred reference to weight and probably not subpar Soviet products).

"Deer crossing.  Moose crossing.  Ram.  Oh, big horn sheep."
"You just named like ten animals." 
"I just wanted to show off how many I can name in seconds."
"Ok, Old McDonald."

"Keep your eyes akimbo."

There are ibex here.  (Big horn sheep also a possibility.)

Snowboard lock possibly not as effective when you lock it on itself (and not the board).

"I can't get my foot in my boot."
"Do you have the gout?"  (Apparently a life of gluttony is even obvious to complete strangers at the  bar.)

Snowboard bindings maybe not the best place to park one's ass when falling off the chairlift.  Not a good landing spot for calves either.  (Popeye calves much larger than they appear.)

"My boot is either too tight or too loose.  I feel like Goldishoe."(NBB just prior to getting rammed in the back by someone whose bruises/popeye calves clearly impede the ability to get off a chairlift.)

No bells, but three magic carpets at Big Sky.

(Luminox.  Watch of choice of snowboarders.  And photography dudes from MT who get calls from caller ID 0000000 then later suspect customers building rapport.)

Better Olympic commentary than Lindsay Vonn: 
"Marc Antoine Gagnon?  He won't be gagner'ing anything.  More like Marc Antoine Perdu."

"Do you think you know how to identify Filipinos just because you can say chinellas?" (Evidently a true statement.)

"If you have to use a household item during an Olympic sport, it's probably not an Olympic sport."

"Hey can you pour me some too?" (Code for can you throw my cup in the trash?  Thanks God for mind reading.)

"Should I Shazam myself to see if it's recognized?" (Unfortunately, NBB, you just missed the casting call for the latest season of The Voice.)

Thanks, Nathan, for cleaning the room, making hospital corners, and giving us new soap every day.  Hide the Advil was fun too.

"Awesome." (Nathan's response when he learned of our hard cider leave behinds.)

Almost as good as a Hungry Moose sandwich and also an effective meal for both Sporcle strength and prepping for panus Skeleton in the 2018 Olympics.
(Preview of upcoming bestseller below.)

"You won then you were all upsie daisy to leave fast."  (Better to rush than to lose that prime spot behind the door of the spa.)

Most durable snackiepoo for the slopes, especially when one occasionally lands on one's head and back. 

Crop duster.  (Not to be confused with someone who attempted to surreptitiously crop dust in the bathroom post numerous aforementioned snackiepoos.)

Could not be more true. (Thanks for the wisdom, Shanghai.)

Snack break to compensate for the most unattractive completion of a black diamond run. (At least no testing of the helmet, like on Tippy's.)

The reliable Lesbaru.  (Drives even better with one snowboard boot off.)

Moose knuckle welcome at the snowboard school.

 Pre flight conversation
"Filing down this nail will take forever."
"You have an hour.  What are you filing, carbon?"

In flight conversation
"I don't have room for your panus hand." (Better or worse than Popeye calves?)

Clearly much more interesting in flight conversation. (Unfortunately bromance died before arrival.)
"What middle school did you go to?"
"I'm going on a heli skiing trip in Alaska."
"I don't know much about skiiing in Alaska [possibly because this was only the 25th time I've skied] but ski trips are a good way to stay connected with friends."

Not actual photo as seen in Belgrade since the Holstein Horse is about as rare as Nessy.

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